Changshu Highlander Hash - Run Number 11 (away) - 27.03.2010
5 intrepid Suzhou Hashers turned up, on time, at the appointed meeting place.
MasterKater and Ivana kindly broke off work to bring along the beer and refreshments so the excited Hashers set off in high spirits for ChangShu – little did they know.
All 5 can vouch for the main street through Changshu being a) extremely busy and b) the capital for car seat covers shops for the whole of China – they were everywhere!
But how were our intrepid little party to know that they should not be in the main street running through Changshu?
Well maybe the fact that the driver was trying to use a GPS should have maybe given at least a hint of a clue … … … … … …
Finally, after many increasingly desperate phone calls and even more U turns and backwards and forwarding up and down the road, the tall welcoming figure of Footrot hove into view.
A which point one Suzhou Hasher (who shall remain anonymous – for the moment at least) was heard to exclaim “Oh I saw him earlier and wondered why a westerner was standing on the roadside” A westerner it must be added, with a bludy great 2 metre tall post, topped with a bright red HHH sign!!!
However we arrived just in time to see the mini hash circle up and begin their “run”. A quick adult circle followed with explicit instructions by the hares Blondie and Footrot to ignore the rather delicate shade of pink raffia markers, as this indicated the mini hashers trail – honest Duckie. Much as the RA was sore tempted, even HE would not stoop so low as to follow a children’s trail (well at least not with witnesses around)
The trail led out to some nice countryside and across some gently rolling terrain – quite unlike it must be said the “North Face of the Eiger” trail that our own hares has us scale on the last home hash. This Wuxi hash had three levels of trail, snail trail, runners trail short, runners trail long.
No beer stop, some confusing marking, the almost obligatory short cutting and even some gross cheating, typified this hash. The gross cheating must be explained, certain hashers were seen to ask a local “which way did they go?” of which he obligingly informed them, and off our cheating hashers ran. It is with a certain amount of glee that your scribe can report, poetic justice was served, the “trail” was infact in the totally wrong direction – let this be a warning to all the cheaters!!! After the correct trail leading us past some nice old traditional Chinese buildings, through tea plantations and along both lake and riverside the hashers arrived back at the start/finish of the run – some it must be stated, suspiciously early.
Everyone finally arrived and it is here that your scribe must give you sage advice, an Irish Hash Brew may know exactly how to serve poteen and even Guinness but obviously NOT Tsingtao beer. No hasher enjoys warm beer but trying to do down downs when there is quite literally ice in the bottle or cup, is not good form, no one had obviously explained to Short and Quick that Ice Beer is just the name of a beer.
Just after the start of the circle a strange sound could be heard in the distance and getting closer – what is this bagpipes in Changshu? Never, surely not – but then, around a corner proudly strode a brave Footrot in a resplendent Highland outfit complete with bagpipes, which, it must be admitted he played rather well. Brave Footrot you ask? Well yes, lets face it you have got to be brave to turn up to a half drunk Hash circle wearing a skirt.
As usual at a Wuxi Hash there were lots of charges although because of the freezing beer not many hashers were looking forward to being invited into the circle. The Suzhou hashers were also introduced a nice rule of the Wuxi hash, if the person in the circle does not want to drink their down down, then they can name another hasher to drink the down down for them. Your RA and Sherry were thus called into the circle to drink down downs for offences of which they were blameless and completely innocent!
Just when the beer has started to thaw and become drinkable, without actually freezing one’s tonsils, the circle was brought to a close and everyone moved into the on site restaurant where a veritable feast was laid before the assembled hashers, excellent cooking and more than enough for those present. With food still left on the tables the Suzhou hashers had to re-bus and make there weary way back to Suzhou. Not it must be recorded, back through the centre of town, simply and quickly out onto the main Suzhou/Changshu road and, for your scribe, quickly back to the Blue Marlin to hand over the almost intact box of beer and snacks. Come on, why should we drink and eat Suzhou scran when we had Wuxi scran on offer? Up there for thinking, down there for Hashing is the sign of a good hasher. |
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