We all met at Garbo’s on what turned out to be the last real day of summer in Suzhou. Katie and Tiny Tim were Hares for this adventure through the gardens and pathways of Ligong Di and along the lake. The Hares had tried to mark all trails clearly in chalk and flour, and had made special efforts to avoid security guards’ glares, cleaners’ brooms and kitchen boys’ buckets of water. However, judging by the amount of short-cutting that went on, they had limited success. The trail started off going over the bridge into Outlets and down into a secret park on the lake, previously known only to Tiny Tim and kayakers. At this stage, Marge saw a Hash Mark that said "ON-ON / Over" and was ready to head back to Garbo’s for refreshments. After being convinced by her fellow-hounds that the "Over" part actually just meant "Over the Bridge" even she herself had to concede that 1km really was a bit short for your average Hash. From there the group returned to Ligong Di and wound alongside Jinji Hu Lake, through parks and beer gardens and along the boardwalk. As this had been announced as an "A to nearly A" Run, the hounds came out over the Bridge just past the Regalia, and were prepared to turn back when the security guard on duty pointed them down a flour-marked path that led off the road and into the meadows of the Ligong Di Peninsula. This is where it all fell apart. Mary ran hard along the lake path to keep the crew on trail, but Gary was heard to say that he would shortcut across the meadow, taking some of the others along with him. Sinead claimed to have seen the apparition of a large dead bird in the middle of a field and used this as her excuse to avoid the (much longer) Peninsula path. Several delusional Hashers following her also claimed that the dead bird was clearly a flour mark substitute, thereby effectovely cutting almost 2K off the run. Our new Taiwanese hasher Yellow S. was a notable exception; no short-cutting for her. Though an experienced hasher, she somehow assumed that her fortitude in sticking to the trail would make up for her new shoes in the eyes of the Suzhou H3. Needless to say, no mercy was shown to her at the Down-Down, and the shoes were duly baptized in beer. Having absolved three runs and a Haring, Katie was to be named during this Down-Down, and she dutifully sat on a block of ice for the honors to be done. Maybe it was the weather turning cold, maybe it was all the shortcutting, or maybe just a bit too much fresh lakefront air that led to a breakdown in creativity that day. For the life of them, the group could not agree on a suitable name. So it was an experience in wet shorts for the Run’s Co-Hare, who then quickly ran from the scene. The Hashers packed up the cooler and had started walking back to Garbo’s for the Bash when Katie returned with a bribed electric car driver in tow. The Hashers all got a seat and were taken back to the Bash in style. Lars of Garbo’s fame provided Xinjiang beef stew on the house, but the Bash itself was really most memorable for stolen beer mugs, new Hash t-shirts and lots of headstands. I guess you had to be there….